Her Story
lurk
- a: to lie in wait in a place of concealment especially for an evil purpose b: to move furtively or inconspicuously c: to persist in staying
- a: to be concealed but capable of being discovered ; specifically : to constitute a latent threat b: to lie hidden
- to read messages on an Internet discussion forum (as a newsgroup or chat room) without contributing
Lurking. That’s the word that brought us together.
I was on Yelp.com scanning through conversation threads, during a lull in my workday. Of all of the comments, faces, and nonsense, one word caught my eye. Among all of the responses, Mike L. identified himself as a long time “lurker” – a word that perfectly described my own habits on the website. I had never responded to a thread, but felt compelled to respond to this Mike L. character. I posted a response, shouting out to Mike L. recognizing his use of the word.
Soon, Mike and I exchanged a few friendly messages online, mostly about the Yelp, our love for the Los Angeles Dodgers and USC Football. One night, Rosie, Sheryl, Trinity and I decided to head to Blue Goose Lounge for a fellow Yelper’s birthday. I saw Mike and his little brother Mark sitting on a big leather couch across the room. Feeling bold, I walked across the room and declared, “You’re Mike L. aren’t you?” Great opening line, I know. That night was a blur, filled with mini-reunions (Ryan and Kristine! Danny and Casey!), rum and cokes, Newcastles, and glass crashing on the dance floor (way to go Mark and Rosie!). That night Rosie invited our new friends, the Lee brothers, to her birthday celebration the next week.
That next Friday, we gathered downtown to celebrate Rosie’s birthday. Mike and Mark came, donning their “I Got Cozy With Rosie” pink t-shirts and partaking in the birthday revelry. Feeling bad for Mike since he didn’t know many others at the party, I stuck close to him making sure he didn’t feel left out. When the party shifted to a nearby bar, I ended up stuck outside with a crowd of boys, including Mike, and found I didn’t mind it so much.
When we finally made it inside, I ended up in a booth next to Mike. In the midst of flying cupcake frosting, loud music and birthday chaos, I felt compelled to reach out and grab his hand. So I did. And that’s where it all began.
The next week, Mike and I went to Griffith Observatory on our first date. A stormy afternoon cleared just as we arrived at the Observatory, and after watching the planetarium show we enjoyed a crimson sunset and a gloriously clear night.
Almost eight months later, I stood at a Griffith Observatory outlook as Mike perched on one knee and asked me to marry him. In between sobs of happiness, I said yes.
From the day I walked up to Mike, somehow I knew he would be an important part of my life. We have done silly things together like feed giraffes and rhinos in San Diego, zip around Santa Barbara on Segways, and innertube down irrigation ditches in Kauai. But we’ve also been challenged by job loss, multiple hospital stays and a painful recovery. But throughout it all, Mike has been a constant source of strength, stability, humor, compassion, warmth, and generosity. I look forward to building a future and a family with the man who makes my life more amazing and fulfilling than I ever thought it would be.
Yes -- Lurking on a website changed my life forever.
His Story
Technically we first met on August 27, 2007. It sounds kind of dorky, but it really isn’t.
You see, I found the website Yelp.com basically out of necessity. It’s a review site and hosts real reviews from real people on local establishments (mostly food) and I love eating.
I hadn’t used Yelp for anything other than looking up reviews, but in late 2007 I somehow felt compelled start reviewing places because of a negative experience I had at a local restaurant.
After reviewing a few places, I found that the site had a ‘forum’ feature, where locals would post chats all day long about just about any subject. On a particular day in August 2007 there was a post titled “Newbies Welcome!” and I was casually scrolling through it and decided to post a little bit about myself.
I used a word, lurking, to signify that I was just there checking things out and not necessarily there to participate.
I then received a comment back from this girl named Mel D: “Mike L. - Yay for fellow converted lurkers!” and that was the first time we actually met.
We added each other as friends on Yelp that day and exchanged a few casual e-mails back and forth.
I then found out about an event that was coming up at a bar that had very positive reviews and I wanted to check it out. It was a birthday party for a fellow Yelper and I thought it would be kind of cool to meet some of the people whose reviews had helped me in my quest for awesome food places.
I convinced my younger brother Mark, who had just turned 21, to go to this bar with me for this party to meet these Yelpers.
We got there early and not too many people had arrived yet. We hung out and had a few drinks for a little while just chatting it up. It started to get busy and as I was headed to the bar for another round, Mel D. came up to me and said “You’re Mike L aren’t you??”
We chatted for a few minutes, then Mark and I end up joining Mel D. and her friends (including Rosie C.) for the rest of the evening.
At the end of the night we all parted ways and Rosie C. explained that her birthday was the next weekend and Mark and I should come. We agreed.
Over the course of the week I needed to know what to bring Rosie for her birthday, so I sent an email to Mel asking her what she thought. We conversed back and forth for a few days about different things and agreed that we’d see each other at the birthday party.
Mark and I showed up to the party and didn’t really know anyone other than Mel and Rosie. Luckily there were a few open seats next to Mel, so we sat down and she welcomed us. We ended up leaving the first place we were at and headed to the next. There was quite a long line outside this place and Mel decided to stand outside with us guys waiting for us to get in – because I’m sure Mark and I would have left after a few minutes of just standing there.
Since I’m a shy person, I didn’t want to embarrass myself, but once we got inside this place, after a while Mel got tired of waiting and made the first move by grabbing my hand.
Luckily she did, because I’m not sure we’d be in the same place as we are today if she didn’t.